


Difficulty

by FriedCatfish



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Post-Neutral Ending (the really sad one), autistic headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-04-30 19:38:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5177231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriedCatfish/pseuds/FriedCatfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"papyrus... finds difficulty in interesting places. yesterday he got stumped trying to 'solve' the horoscope."</p><p><strong>Someone</strong> has to lead the Underground, and Papyrus is as good a candidate as any.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Difficulty

**Author's Note:**

> Draws mostly from the "King Papyrus" variant of the neutral ending, though also some of the other sad ones, I guess because I hate myself and love crying????

Sans knows that a lot of people, when they first meet him, think that Papyrus is "dumb" or "slow" or "not all there." He tries not to let it get to him - it doesn't get to his brother, too much, at least not visibly. "He finds difficulty in _interesting_ places," is how Sans likes to put it, remembering the time Papyrus convinced himself that the horoscope was some kind of logic puzzle or coded message. Papyrus's brain is just wired differently, Sans reminds himself, even if technically neither of them has "brains" at all.

Take the crossword, for instance. Once or twice, Papyrus actually bothered with them, and he breezed through them - and as soon as he did that, he decided that crosswords were too easy, not worth his time anymore. "THEY'RE NOT EVEN PUZZLES, SANS. THEY'RE JUST VOCABULARY TESTS." For whatever reason, as far as Sans can tell, he  _really does_ have more trouble with the Junior Jumble, so ultimately - as much as he'll tease his little bro about it - Sans is okay with him struggling to decrypt ENOB and PKCI, because that's what makes him happy.

Sans would do  **anything** to see his brother happy.

And the other thing is that Papyrus is... actually really perceptive. He's a very quick study, for instance - maybe a little  **too** quick, when it came to Undyne's lessons, but... _well, silver lining to everything, huh?_ Sans tells himself. With her out of the picture, and with the whole "regular spaghetti banquet" thing, Papyrus has actually started to get the hang of it.

But it's not just that. Papyrus knows that he and Undyne are -  **were** \- the same, made the connection between how he hates taking his gloves off and how she would flip her spear in the air whenever she was bored or stressed, and the way she treated her weapons and the way he treats his action figures, and the way neither of them ever had an indoor voice unless they were very consciously trying to keep it down, and the way that both of them really wanted to try dating but neither of them had any idea where to start.

He knows that a bunch of Sans's pranks only work out if time travel is involved somewhere, even if he doesn't know (or care) about the exact mechanics involved. He knows that his brother wasn't  **always** this lazy, even if the memories of that are kind of fuzzy and he never knew much about what Sans did before he became a sentry. He knows that he really loves science fiction, and science in general, really, which is something that almost nobody else knows because they never think to take an interest in Sans beyond "oh, he's that guy who tells puns and drinks ketchup straight."

He knows that being king is  _really really hard,_ and he knows that he wishes his friends were still there so they could give him advice, and he's starting to realize that even when he tries his best there's only so much he can do for a people that's lost all their heroes in one fell swoop.

But some things, even Sans doesn't realize Papyrus realizes.

* * *

The robes didn't fit right, so Papyrus got a new purple cape and got rid of the little insignia on his chestplate, right over where his heart would be if he had one, and replaced it with a big Delta Rune dead center. He doesn't remember the **history** of the Rune, because history is boring. As far as Papyrus is concerned there's nothing to "solve" when it comes to history, 'cause everyone already knows what happened, right? Besides, history... for monsters especially... is sad. But anything could be in the future, which means that you can focus on the good stuff!

But he knows the Delta Rune is what royalty is  **supposed** to wear, and he knows that something about it still gives everyone a little bit of hope, even against their better judgement. So on his chestplate it goes.

New Home was really gray and melancholy, so one of Papyrus's first decrees was that they'd repaint it in bright yellows and reds and greens and purples. It's a work in progress, if only because the place is so big, but he likes to think that people are walking around with a little more of a spring in their step, now. Besides, it gives them something to do, and... he's well aware that if you don't have enough to do, it's a lot easier to get into a bad place.

Papyrus knows it's not a cure-all, though, because Sans is  **really** busy now, and... well. At least he still smiles when Papyrus braves the grease of Grillby's to bring him a burger and some onion rings.

He's started designing some new puzzles, too, and he says it's just because puzzles are cool and important to their heritage, but whenever he talks about it he gets uncharacteristically solemn and quiet. Sometimes he tells himself that if there were just a _few_ more puzzles between the Core and the palace, then...

That's silly, of course. There's nothing to be done about it now.

Besides, Sans said Asgore is just on vacation, with Undyne. And Papyrus reminds himself at least once every day that Sans wouldn't lie about that, because that would be a  **really mean** prank to pull, and Sans doesn't have a mean _bone_ in his body.

(Sans doesn't make too many puns these days, and for whatever reason, that seems to make people sad. So Papyrus is picking up the slack, even if he hates it.)

It's difficult taking up the mantle of a great man like Asgore, but it needs to be done.

So Papyrus sets his mind to it, and Sans helps out every chance he gets, and soon enough... it's not as difficult as he would have expected.

* * *

What was it Gerson always said about the old queen? She was the brains, and Asgore was just a kind face and a charismatic voice? Certain patterns repeated themselves, Sans supposed - smart or not, Papyrus was too sweet for his own good and too willing to focus on the small picture, just like the last king.

But he wasn't dumb, and he wasn't just going along with what Sans said. He set the tone, he picked out the broader agenda. Just because Sans took care of the details didn't change that.

Truth be told, at this point, lying to each other had become just another game. Papyrus knew that Sans was handling things much more important and complicated than "paperwork," and Sans knew that his brother knew that, but they both pretended otherwise. It made things easier on both of them, just like it made things easier to pretend that everyone had just gone on vacation, or to pretend that the human did their best and just ended up in a bad situation - against Undyne? Sure. She never gave up. Against Mettaton? There **might** have been an out, but the guy had his head far enough up his ass that maybe it was hopeless.

Against the woman in the ruins, well... Sans didn't like to think about what happened to her, because he could only think of two options, and either way he was an idiot for trusting strangers so easily. So it was better to pretend that she had just fallen ill, or died of natural causes - she did say she was pretty old, after all. _  
_

They pretended that, when the next human arrived - and one would, eventually, even if it was decades down the line - there wouldn't be any hard decisions to make, or fear for each other's lives. If the human was good, they'd be given puzzles. If they were bad, they'd be given puzzles. Simple as that, end of story.

Pretending made things easier, and right now, that was what the King and the Chancellor needed more than anything else.

* * *

When Sans hands the phone over to him, it's...  _dreamlike,_ is the only appropriate word. It feels like time is skipping and slowing down and going in circles, like things don't fit together right, like everything's the wrong texture and the palace is the wrong layout and at any moment he's gonna wake up and forget all about it and -

Well. Maybe that's wishful thinking. Surreal or not, the human is his friend, and he should talk to them.

"IT'S STRANGE... ASGORE, ALPHYS, METTATON AND UNDYNE WENT AWAY. SANS SAYS THEY WENT ON VACATION..."

Papyrus goes on about how he and his brother are handling things, now that they run the place. The words coming out don't feel like his. Maybe he's too used to giving speeches, and he's sort of forgotten what just having a conversation is like. They all just sort of blur together into a mush, and they feel... insincere.

He doesn't know why the words feel insincere, but they do, and he hates it. So he checks behind him, to make sure Sans is really out of the room. He is.

Maybe it'll feel better if he drops the "brave, ever-hopeful king" act, which he didn't even realize  **was** an act until now.

"...YOU KNOW... DON'T TELL MY BROTHER, BUT... DESPITE THE IMPROVEMENTS WE'VE MADE... SOMETIMES THIS JOB IS KIND OF HARD..."

Papyrus speaks slowly and quietly, which is something he almost never does. But it's...  _difficult_ to find the right words, and to find the right impulse to say them. So it's okay if he takes a while to figure it out. The most rewarding puzzles are the ones that take the longest, after all, so clearly the same goes for talking to a friend.

He tries to take a deep breath, but it ends up sounding shallow anyway.

"...AND, AND, I MISS UNDYNE, TOO. SHE NEVER ANSWERS MY PHONE CALLS. SHE MUST BE..."

He looks over his shoulder again. Sans is still gone.  _MORE PAPERWORK,_ he assumes. Papyrus's voice cracks, and even with the terrible reception, the human can hear the muffled sobs and sniffles ( _ **how?** he doesn't even  **have a nose**_ ) on the other end.

"SHE MUST BE... HAVING A LOT OF FUN ON VACATION!"

There's a long period of silence, and the human is about to hang up when they hear the skeleton's voice one last time.

"...I KNOW... I KNOW MY BROTHER WANTS TO PROTECT ME. EVEN IF HE'S LAZY AND REALLY WEAK AND I SHOULD BE THE ONE PROTECTING HIM. BUT..."

Tears are streaming down his cheekbones, now, and dripping on the official royal stationery. He gently slides the notepad to the other side of the desk.

"I REALLY... I  **REALLY** MISS MY FRIENDS. AND SANS MISSES HIS WEIRD DOOR FRIEND TOO. SO... IF YOU SEE THEM, OR, OR HAVE A WAY TO GET IN TOUCH WITH THEM... CAN YOU PLEASE ASK - CAN YOU PLEASE BRING THEM BACK?"

_Click._

Papyrus grabs a pillow from his bed - even now, still his good old racecar bed, brought all the way over from Snowdin - and he holds it tight against his sternum. He's gonna go around telling everyone they're doing a good job, and to keep up the hard work, later. But right now...

Right now that seems  _really_ difficult, and right now he just needs to breathe.


End file.
